It was a chilly evening in August when I found myself towel bound and compelled to throw out the trash accumulating in the back of my dorm room. Groggily, I stumbled down the hallway amidst the echoes of one night stands and those paying their respects to the porcelain God. I stood in front of the garbage chute and disposed of the empty Cheez-It boxes and spaghetti-o cans. Suddenly, it was silent. I stretched my body upward as I let out a yawn and out of my peripheral ...I saw it. It stood calmly and almost appeared to let out an ominous glow from the end of the hallway. I found myself caught in its grasp and was uncontrollably drawn to it. "This...this can't be real. Only out of my darkest nightmares have I been burdened with something this horrific." I thought to myself. As the fog from my eyes cleared and my mind allowed me to focus on the terror at hand, I saw it.
Your eyes are not deceiving you. What stands before you is the door of a twenty two year old twi-hard. I firmly believe that this is karma biting me in the ass for constantly ridiculing Twatlight fanatics. My punishment for having a passion for intellectually destroying anyone obsessed with this shitstorm of a franchise is that for the rest of this year, I have a jarring omen to ruin my whole day.
I hate college.
I hate college.
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